Those crazy fellas asked limpek a bunch of nonsense for the blog awards thing interview. Nabeh, limpek answer until tao hin hin. Somemore have to double check if not later Engrand zhao cui very embarassing.
Below was the interview limpek replied. The images were added on after la of course:
1. Tell us about yourself in 50 words.
Limpek is Goldfish Uncle. Goldfish Uncle is the uncle offering you lollipop to follow him go see goldfish. But nobody knows if he really got goldfish. Or just something that smells like fish. Oldfolks say, don’t follow strangers! But how you know he really got no goldfish? Fish or no fish, limpek succeed to fill in 50 words as required. (ons la!)
2. How long have you been blogging and why did you start blogging?
Very long of course. But back then limpek got no computer. So limpek blog by talking in the kopitiam to whichever stranger passing by. Sometimes stray dogs. Now got computer, no need waste so much money on the ever increasing price kopi. So plus plus minus minus also got 6048000 seconds of logged blogging. Real blogging in the kopitiam, almost 20 years. Jealous leh. Why start blogging? Lonely, want to talk. Want to find birdbirds of a feather. Want to chiko many hot ger. Want OMY to send limpek go HK find xiaolongnus.
Blogging was easy in the 90s...
3. How do you feel as one of the finalists in the Singapore Blog Awards? What do you think is your chance of winning?
Absolutely 500% because last time got one sai-kong (priest) say limpek with this kind of dragon eyebrow is sure born winner. The ahbeng selling illegal lottery also always tell me that. So limpek believe him and keep buying. But winning the Blog Award is slightly different. That one limpek’s actuarial science friend calculate say got 10% chance. But limpek will try hard to chiko the hot ger judges, like Anna Lim, then maybe can increase to 12%. If cannot, then become finalist also sibeh happy mah… got few new readers.
4. Who do you think are the strongest bloggers in the category you are nominated for and why?
Strongest blogger of course is limpek lah. Limpek can run 10km in 45minutes, they cannot. Limpek can benchpress 70kg, they cannot. Don’t think limpek beer belly fat fat like very useless, just last week the xiao long nu keep telling limpek “Yes! Very hard! Very strong! I love you!”. You say la, who strongest? Ms Judge Anna Lim, want to see limpek’s mouse in the bicep?
5. What would you like to say to your blog readers and those who voted and supported you?
Limpek want to say my dear 5-6 readers/supporters are the best in the world because limpek type and type with all my heart and got people bother to come and read and keep uncle not so lonely. If not limpek really start to think limpek is the only one who cannot fit in the crazy world. Then will have to start talking to the neighbor’s cat and will end up running around naked in the streets one day. Limpek love my readers so much that limpek will shave my balls for them, regardless if limpek win.
6. What is your most controversial blog post and why?
Limpek blog no controversy. Why must purposely create controversy? Later gahmen want you to ki si. Society also boh happy. Limpek oo hami dio kong hami. But don’t know why everytime talk about penis then everybody hua hee. Make the hits jump until sibeh steady.
Why so many people interested in didi? Is the vagina is boh heng already? Siao la you all limpek think should see doctor get mental theraphy. Look see look see, limpek kaulat steady, can rhyme like Jay-Z.
7. Have you ever gotten into trouble or got rewarded for blogging? Elaborate.
No trouble! Trouble comes, blame the dog. Like, when accidentally fart in front of hot ger, faster scold the dog! Reward? My readers is number one reward! Muah muah XOXOHENESSY. Remember people, zhor lang ai hua hee! Become human must be happy!
Limpek show housemate John my interview reply because his Engrand is supposed to be chim-chim...
he only shake his head and say "Kaninah... like that how to win"